THINGS I HATE RIGHT NOW
NOSTALGIA: This is nothing new. I say this all the time. But I used to say it because I had this, like, moral aversion to nostalgia. Now I understand that the problem is much more serious. See, last week during a tech rehearsal, some folks started reminiscing about Schoolhouse Rock, and of course they broke into a chorus of “Interplanet Janet,” “Conjunction Junction,” and that adjective song that Blossom Dearie did. And I started feeling nauseous. Honest-to-goddess: nauseous. (Interesting side note: the “algia” of “nostalgia” technically comes from the Greek word “algos,” meaning “pain.”) So apparently I’m allergic to nostalgia. Too bad, because there great money to be made hosting dance nights with earnestly retro themes.
LIVE OAK TREES: In parks, they’re fine. On plantations, they’re fine. When they’re hanging over my backyard, shedding leaves and dropping stinging caterpillars and providing a home for loud, noisy crows, however…well, that’s a different story.
STUPID PEOPLE: It’s like they’ve been hibernating all winter and have suddenly awoken, but they’re not looking for food, they’re looking for ways to annoy me.
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