My favorite part of the mayor’s new Safety and Security Re-Entry Information bulletin? The opening sentence: “On behalf of Mayor C. Ray Nagin and the City of New Orleans, Welcome Home!”
What’s so good about that, you ask? Well, grammatical eccentricities aside (I mean, what communications director in his right mind would capitalize “Welcome Home” like that?), this oh-so-cheery opener is followed by no less than 17 skull-and-crossbones-style warnings to returning citizens. To paraphrase: Welcome back! You could die here!
My least favorite part? Item #9, which contains contact info for something called “Remains Management” (225 763 5480 or 225 763 5760, if you’re interested). What the hell is that? Is it for dead pets? Dead people? Is that supposed to serve our funerary needs until Bultman is back up and running? I could call and find out, but do I really want to know?
sturtle [dot] com 