Ladies and gentlemen:
I’m proud to say, I’ve had a fairly healthy day. I drank a smoothie for breakfast, ate a light lunch, and put in 45 minutes on the treadmill (several minutes longer than usual). At the moment, I’m eating a spinach salad, which has been dressed with several dashes of oddly delectable German vinegar I found at one of New Orleans few functioning supermarkets.
In half an hour’s time, however, things will be very different: things will go very wrong. For in thirty minutes, Adult Swim begins. Immediately prior, I will remove a bowl from the refrigerator–a bowl containing one pint of sour cream and one container of onion soup mix. I will then remove a plastic bag from the pantry–a plastic bag containing potato chips. Many of them. I will then consume these items in the bingeful, ravenous, white trash manner of my ancestors.
Should I pass away in the middle of the night, laid low in simultaneous explosions of nausea and flatulence, I would be very grateful if someone would take charge of shipping my personal effects to Jonno. He’ll know how to dispose of them tastelessly.
Yours in gluttony,
Rico
Update at 9:03: Just in case any of you thought I was joking…
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