I’m no Confucius, but every so often I’m compelled to share a little bit of wisdom that was passed down from my paternal grandmother. (Sadly, my maternal grandmother–a half-crazy, half-German lady who always smelled like two-day-old coffee–had few words, wise or otherwise, for anyone.) On the shores of a beautiful lake on an even more beautiful fall afternoon, as she was pulling another worm from the bait bucket and shoving it onto the business end of her fish hook, my grandmama leaned over to me and said:
Richard, people are stupid.
Today, I know she was right. I see evidence of her wisdom every time I visit Walgreens, as the checkout girl takes five minutes to ring up my DC and corn nuts because she’s in rapt conversation with her third cousin two aisles over. I see it on Bourbon Street, as grown men and women drink rotgut liquor from novelty plastic cups, puke it all into the gutter, then start the process over. But most of all, I see it splashed across the pages of the Picayune, in stories about the city we call home and the people we sometimes begrudgingly call neighbors.
Take, for example, an article from yesterday’s paper, which documented a meeting held Sunday by worldfamousauthor Ken Foster and others to organize a march on City Hall in protest of the current crime wave gripping New Orleans.
To loud applause, people called for the resignations of District Attorney Eddie Jordan and New Orleans Police Department Superintendent Warren Riley. They asked where Mayor Ray Nagin was, and why he wasn’t providing the city with leadership at a time like this…. A high school teacher talked about how the drug dealers in her classroom had the lowest reading scores. A few people decried the city’s criminal justice system and the lack of cooperation between the district attorney’s office and the NOPD.
Um, does one of those sentences seem odd to you? Like it was just dropped there, without context? Like it probably merits further discussion? I mean, if we get those reading scores up, can we expect drug dealers to be more positive role models in their communities? …I’m not sure who’s at fault here–the reporter or the teacher–but for the sake of argument, let’s call ’em both stupid.
A few paragraphs later, another Mensa member speaks up:
Eric Carter, an organizer for Common Ground, said he was heartened by the big turnout but discouraged that so many faces in the crowd were white…. “We’ve got all these people here,” said Carter, who is African-American. “This isn’t a sample of the community. We make up, what, 2 or 3 percent of this audience. It’s all these white people in a room talking.”
I hope the reporter’s use of the word “discouraged” was another case of stupidity. Otherwise, we have to wonder:
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Was Mr. Carter born dumb, or did the stinky hippies at Common Ground infect him with their idiot cooties?
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Would Mr. Carter rather Whitey just stay home and let African Americans take care of the problem, since crime has no effect on white people at all?
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Was Mr. Carter leveling a charge of racism at the post office, which had obviously misplaced all the engraved invitations Ken sent out to African American households but somehow managed to deliver them to white folks?
There’s more stupidity afoot, but that’s as far as I can go today and still keep myself from pummelling passersby.
[This tirade thanks in part to Tyler.]
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