Finally finally finally this global obsession with all things 80s may be over. Which is great because as much as I love Alison Moyet (May She Live Forever), I could really do without one more Millennial metaphorically digging through my high school closet and shouting, “Omigod, what were they thinking? I must wear it immediately!” They’ve already adopted leggings and Hammer pants*, so it is only a matter of time before Girbaud jeans make a full-on comeback, in which case, may goddess have mercy on our souls.
I say that the end is nigh because I have heard that Jennifer Saunders is writing a musical about the Spice Girls. And if you throw in an internet boom, a lot of heroin, and a housing bubble, that’s pretty much all you need for a time capsule explanation of the 1990s that even aliens from the galaxy of Gaahhrglepleghghx could understand and say, “Oh. Crushed velvet. I get it.”
These are exciting times we (re)live in.
* I can say with all honesty that I never, ever, ever wore Hammer pants.