…so then he just dropped his pants and started touching himself–right in the middle of the street! Good God almighty, Mabel, I near about had a stroke at the feet of Naomi Jeffcoat–and she never would have let me live that down, let me tell you. After that tabasco incident at the Easter bake sale, I absolutely refuse to trust that woman! Now don’t go getting me wrong: I adore the pastor, but sugar, that Naomi never has been nothing but trouble…
Are you listening to me, Mabel? …Well, all right then. I never heard you so quiet. What’s got into you? Is Ed at it again? Mabel, I tell you, you got to keep that man away from Dr. Chisolm’s office. He’s gonna kill you one of these days–along with half the church choir! He ain’t right! I just wish you’d been out back with us the other night after the service. Why, out of nowhere he just starts in on Shirley P., and you know how fluttery her heart is these days…
Oh, gotta run. Almost time for The Simpsons. I’ll talk to you later dear. Give Ed my love…
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