The 50 Most Loathsome New Yorkers
#50: Naomi Campbell, model
The quintessential don’t-you-know-who-I-am celebrity has made headlines for her Mansonesque behavior toward bellhops, assistants and other people with real jobs. It’s easy to hate models; we’d all like to make a living getting fucked in speedboats and staying hooked on other peoples’ heroin. But a model who’s an ungrateful asshole to boot actually deserves the inevitable cruel fate of her lot: an early middle age of sagging tits, Botox, secret Rogaine treatments and fat stockbroker boyfriends with hairy backs.
And it gets better…
Still, I think the list is missing a couple of people. Like, where’s that asshole Midtown chorus boy who stalked me for two months, then pretended we’d never met when I finally called him on it? Where’s the part-time dj/full-time schmuck who dumped me like a hot rock ’cause I wasn’t a freaking hairdresser? Where’s that homeless guy/drug dealer who used to yell and spit at me every time I traversed 2nd and B? Where’s Chip Duckett?!
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