Somewhere in this house, beneath layers of dust and dog hair, is a photo of me dressed as Aeon Flux.
Well, kinda.
If you’re old enough to remember the animated series on MTV, you know how insane her costumes were. To call them “extreme” would be an understatement: they were little more than cleverly positioned webs of leatherette. Of course, she was able to wear such things because she was a cartoon and not bound to the conventions of three-dimensional human physique.
When I decided to recreate that look for Carnival in 1995, I was faced with two serious problems. First, I had to find the costume–I mean, you don’t find that kind of stuff lying around Banana Republic (or Frederick’s of Hollywood, for that matter). And second, I had to tailor the costume to my own body: whereas Aeon was tall and sinewy, with broad shoulders, zero body fat, and crazy, crazy hair, I’m of average height, average build, and prone to chunkiness. And I think I had a crew cut at the time. Clearly, I had to adapt. Either that, or I’d come off looking like Comic Book Guy dressed for a Star Trek convention.
By the time I was done, I looked nothing like the bitch. I’d gone for a black meshy top that clung to my body but still managed to hide a lot. On the bottom, I had some good over-the-knee tights, but I didn’t have the cash to spend on a pair of thigh-high boots, so I went with my usual Doc Martens–practical, but so clearly not the look. The hair proved hardest: in the end, I was stuck with a very thick, very hot wig that reminded me of Jackie O in the 1970s. And for reasons I can’t recall, I topped the whole thing off with a Hello Kitty umbrella.
Ah, to be young, dumb, and full of drugs.
I mention all this because I recently stumbled across the site for the impending Aeon Flux big-screen blockbuster, which will be released in conjunction with a videogame for Xbox and a new comic book. Both the video game and the comic book feature a revamped, younger, more pop star-esque heroine–presumably to reinforce the image of Charlize Theron in the title role of the film. But most important is Aeon’s revised wardrobe: that strappy stuff is gone, and Charlize-cum-Aeon is wearing nothing but sheaths. So apparently, I’m not the only person who’s been forced to adpat the Aeon look to fit my needs. And hey, if Hollywood can’t pull it off, I don’t feel so bad.
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