Alien Hand Syndrome & Involuntary Masturbation
When transferred to the rehabilitation service 4 days later, he was noted to have left upper limb apraxia with involuntary movements. He stated, “my left hand has a mind of his own.” He developed a tonic grasp reflex with inability to release…. The patient’s wife also expressed deep concern when her husband’s left hand would publicly expose his genitals and begin masturbating. This occurred on many occasions when the patient was conversing with his caregivers and was confirmed by the authors on their daily rounds. The behavior was never seen to occur through the action of the right hand. The patient also denies any history of excessive self-stimulation, sexual dysfunction, or exhibitionism. During his hospital stay, the patient expressed frustration and dismay when he realized that he was masturbating publicly and with his inability to voluntarily release his grasp of objects in the left hand. [emphasis mine]
—Plover.com vaguely via BB
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That is classic. I’m going to try this excuse!