Much has been made of Burns’ love affair with plastic surgery — in fact Pete himself complained about it in court and received a tidy sum in return.
But despite all that, despite the critics and Burns’ own grumblings, it looks like he’s still going full-silicone-ahead.
And you know what? Rock on sister.
Maybe Petey really enjoys playing the femme card. Maybe he realizes that his face is fucked beyond repair. Maybe he’s following the best piece of advice I ever got: if you can’t solve a problem, make it bigger. I mean, check those lips. Ya heard?
There are a thousand reasons why Burns might refuse to get off the train, but at least he isn’t shy about it. If Mr. Thing wants to work the Buffalo Gal/Cher/Black Mamba look, what the hell difference does it make? Lady Gaga pops out of an egg, and people call it art, but Burns wakes up every day in this shit. Who’s the real visionary?
Besides, in the future, we’re all going to look like this. Pete’s just ahead of the curve.
* Not like he asked for my help, but I’m a very giving person.