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BEST TITLE EVER. NOT TO MENTION THE LEDE.

Porn filmed in Japanese McDonald’s? I’m rubbin’ it!

McDonald’s customers suspected something amiss when one guy pulled out his whopper. They knew for sure when he began partaking of fur burger. The upshot was four people trying to make an adult movie in a fast food outlet ended up getting arrested….

An adult movie production company associate adds his two bits.

“They probably did something that stupid because they wanted to cut production costs,” the associate says.

“Putting the actress’s wages aside, 10 years ago most cheap adult movies had a budget of about 1 million yen, but now that figure is more likely to be 500,000 yen or, in really bad cases, only around 300,000 yen. If you’ve only got 300,000 yen to work with, there’ll be no room to book a studio or hotel room once you’ve rented the filming equipment and paid the guys’ wages. So that’s probably why they filmed in the fast food restaurant….”

—full story at Mainichi Daily News

For those doing the math, remember: markets vary, but 1 Japanese yen is usually worth about 1 US penny. So 300,000 yen = 3000 dollars, more or less. Which isn’t really enough to film opening credits in the Valley, much less a bona fide scene.

Assuming John, Hillary, and Barack have sufficiently addressed the rising costs of oil and food in their platforms, maybe they ought to add a statement about the rising cost of porn. That’d be enough to make even me pay attention.

P.S. Tyler pointed me toward a questionable report that verifies what I’d previously wondered: apparently, political opinions are genetic after all.

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A BRIEF SUMMARY OF MY POLITICAL VIEWS
Because I’ve completely lost interest in the presidential campaigns, and I’m wondering why.

  • My opinions haven’t changed much in 20 years, though I’ve certainly become less vocal.

  • My opinions have never been especially strong, though I give regularly to certain causes.

  • My father claims to be a conservative, though he and I are closer on some issues than he’d like to admit.

  • My adoptive mother taught me to be compassionate, though she seems to have lost that trait herself.

  • My biological mother and I agree on most things, and I only met her six years ago. Are political views genetic?

  • I’m happy that grad school gave me the ability to see issues from multiple perspectives, but it can make decisions a little difficult.

  • My boyfriend is more willing to make a political statement than I am, which is kinda remarkable for a double-Libra.

  • I’ve never put up a yard sign for a candidate. Mostly because I’ve never had a yard.

  • I’ve never permanently attached a political bumper sticker to my car, though I’ve used Scotch tape.

  • Although I hate to admit it, I seem to be an “issues voter”. And now that the issues are (mostly) going my way, I’ve gotten lazy.

  • There’s no one to demonize in the upcoming election, which makes things a little dullsville. Of course, the vice presidential candidates haven’t been announced yet. Perhaps someone will take a cue from reality TV and throw Wendy Pepper in the mix. Just to spice things up. (NB: Absolutely no pun intended with “pepper” and “spice”. Gag.)
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I’m all for gays and reality television and all, but this kinda makes my skin crawl:

Are you and your gay BFF the real life Will & Grace?

Are your friends constantly calling you Will and Grace? Jack and Karen? Kathy and her best gay? A new game show celebrating the fascinating, complex, and hilarious relationship between straight girls and their gay best friend is now casting! So if you’re fun, outrageous, and know a lot of pop culture and mindless trivia, then we want you as a CONTESTANT!

We are looking for BFF couples of all ages, who have a great dynamic together to take part in this new game show for a major cable network. If you think that you and your BFF would be fabulous, make sure to include pictures and info about both of you as well as how long you you’ve known each other and a brief description of your relationship. You must be available May 20 and 21.

I know: total ick, right? But maybe some of you aren’t as creeped about playing minstrels à la Will and Grace. In which case, you know, go for it.

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H E L P !

If you have a Grand Central account, please let me know! A friend of mine needs an account, but the site’s in beta (again), so you have to be invited to participate, and you can only be invited by current members, so…well, you see where this is going.

FYI, I’m very good at showing my appreciation.

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FRIDAY IS FOR VIDEO

1. For the two of you who haven’t heard: Chriso‘s band, Ex-Boyfriends, just released a new video, like, Wednesday. Rock out while you’re playing ForumWarz and downing butter mints from the breakroom, waiting for the big hand to hit 5.

2. Martijn Hendriks’ latest project involves removing all the birds from The Birds, one frame at a time. It’s pretty gimmicky, and sadly, the result is pretty weak. His digi-skills are far from perfect, and since he doesn’t remove the audio, it’s kinda like nothing changed. Garfield Minus Garfield does the same thing, but totally way better. See for yourself:

Also: the whole “Hitchcock homage” has been done to death (perhaps most intriguingly by Stan Douglas). Which is not to say that future artists shouldn’t explore Hitchcock’s work, but if you’re gonna tread on well-trodden turf, you better bring it, bitch.

3. An overview of war in the 20th and 21st centuries, as told through food. Or rather, with food:

Courtesy of BoingBoingTV, which offers a slightly different version with helpful titles.

4. And here’s a really crappy copy of one of Jonno’s faves: Dara Birnbaum’s Kiss the Girls:

5. Someone mashed up a bunch of snippets from Reform School Girls–a film that’s been occupying a lot of my time recently. Mainly because we’re performing it in less than a month:

6. And a parting gift of even more video fabulosity, including a full (hooray!), downloadable (hooray!), QuickTime (boo!) version of Todd Haynes’ Barbie doll masterpiece, Superstar. Totally. Not. Kidding.

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I’m not what you’d call a political activist, but this crossed my inbox a couple of minutes ago, and I thought it was worth passing on. I hope you’ll consider signing the petition, whether you live in New Orleans or not.

Right-wing pastor John Hagee says Katrina was New Orleans’ fault. John McCain sought out, and embraces, Hagee’s support. MoveOn members are trying to deliver a petition to McCain in New Orleans just a few hours from now: will you sign?

Here’s the background: McCain wants America to see him as a compassionate, mainstream politician. So he’s going to New Orleans today for a photo-op in the 9th Ward.

But he’s still trying to shore up his right-wing base—so this past Sunday, he again welcomed the support of right-wing evangelist John Hagee, who said “Hurricane Katrina was, in fact, the judgment of God against the city of New Orleans.”1

MoveOn members in New Orleans have organized an emergency rally outside McCain’s event today. With the media looking on, they’ll try to deliver our petition asking him to stop pandering to right-wing bigots like Hagee. They’ll announce an up-to-the-minute number of signatures, and we’ll have a real impact if we can say that hundreds of thousands have signed in only a few hours. Clicking here will add your name:

http://pol.moveon.org/mccain_pander/o.pl?id=12500-5148471-J6FuvA&t=3

The petition reads: “John Hagee continues to blame the people of New Orleans for the catastrophe of Katrina. Senator McCain: If you reject intolerance and bigotry, reject Hagee’s political support and stop courting hate-mongers like him.”

This is not a gaffe or a “gotcha.” Hagee has a history of bigoted comments and he stood by his New Orleans remarks just days ago.2 And McCain’s strategy is intentional—he’s been working hard to court far-right leaders like Jerry Falwell and John Hagee, despite their hateful views.3 Even when he was pressed about Hagee’s hateful views, McCain said he was “glad to have his endorsement.”4

Hagee’s words matter. Katrina was a terrible reminder of the consequences of bigotry and exclusion. People without resources, without political power, literally sank beneath the waves while our government did nothing.

John McCain is relying for political support on a man who preaches bigotry and exclusion, who spreads the kind of hate that allowed Katrina to become a man-made tragedy. While the media is focused on his New Orleans visit, we need to call him on it.

The more folks who sign the petition in the next few hours, the greater our impact. Clicking here will add your name right now:

http://pol.moveon.org/mccain_pander/o.pl?id=12500-5148471-J6FuvA&t=3

We need to let Senator McCain know that he can’t use New Orleans for a photo-op while still courting the political support of hate-mongers like Hagee. New Orleans deserves better and America does, too.

Thank you very much for all you do.

-–Eli, Justin, Lenore, Patrick S., Anna, and the MoveOn.org Political Action Team, Thursday, April 24th, 2008

Sources:

1. “Will MSNBC devote as much coverage to McCain’s embrace of Hagee’s support as it did to Obama’s rejection of Farrakhan?” Media Matters, February 28th, 2008
http://mediamatters.org/items/200802280018

2. “Hagee Says Hurricane Katrina Struck New Orleans ‘Because it was ‘Planning a Sinful Homosexual Rally,'” Think Progress, April 23, 2008
http://thinkprogress.org/2008/04/23/hagee-katrina-mccain/

“Will MSNBC devote as much coverage to McCain’s embrace of Hagee’s support as it did to Obama’s rejection of Farrakhan?” Media Matters, February 28th, 2008
http://mediamatters.org/items/200802280018

3. “Hagee: McCain ‘sought my endorsement,'” ThinkProgress, March 20th, 2008
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=3603&id=12500-5148471-J6FuvA&t=5

“McCain Gets Into Bed with the Religious Right,” People For the American Way, February 28th, 2008
http://www.pfaw.org/pfaw/general/default.aspx?oid=25053

“McCain Woos the Right, Makes Peace With Falwell,” ABC News, March 26th, 2006
http://abcnews.go.com/Politics/story?id=1779141&page=1

4. “McCain Flip-Flops In 30 Seconds: Hagee Endorsement A ‘Mistake,’ But ‘I’m Glad To Have’ It,” ThinkProgress, April 21st, 2008
http://thinkprogress.org/2008/04/21/hagee-flip-flop/

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I am not a science nerd.

Allow me to clarify: I am not a science nerd anymore. Yes, there was a time when Boyle’s and Charles’ Law held my interest and gave me hope for a better tomorrow. Then got to college and discovered keggers and I was, like, so over it.

Nevertheless, there is a teeny, tiny part of me that envies Bill Nye and his scientific ilk. It manifests itself mostly in the pleasure I take in hand-coding web pages and exploring the embed codes for third-party apps. (I know: express train to Snoozeville.) But yesterday, I kinda went wiggy over something completely different: the temporary opening of the Bonnet Carré Spillway.

Those who don’t live in the Mississippi River Basin might not know that the river is currently at or above flood stage along its lower route. To ease the pressure on the river levees–which, for the ten millionth time, were not the levees that failed during Katrina–the now-attentive Army Corps of Engineers has opened the gates to the Bonnet Carré Spillway, injecting Lake Pontchartrain with some of the Mississippi’s silty goodness.

I didn’t think much of it when the floodgates swung open a couple of weeks ago (although some people clearly think about it a lot). But then I drove over the spillway en route to Baton Rouge yesterday, and…well, it’s kinda cool. Water is rushing through little inlets and bayous, and a couple hundred yards into the lake, there’s all this mist–presumably where the warm-ish river water reaches the colder depths of the lake. I didn’t get so obsessed that I pulled over to take pics or anything, but, yeah, it was nifty. See it if you can.