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…and on the adoptive family front, my father’s new favorite show is U.K. sitcom Keeping Up Appearances. That’s shocking for two reasons: (a) dad’s usually terrified by non-Southern accents, and (b) someone in Mississippi is broadcasting classic British light comedy of the early 1990s. Hmmm.

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Dear Zack Hudson:

What is it with you? Do you think local politics have gotten too blasé? Are you upset that Louisiana’s getting upstaged by Blagojewhatsisname and Larry Craig and Ted Stevens and the like? What, you don’t think David Vitter and Dollar Bill Jefferson generate enough raised eyebrows? Not satisfied with the sedate, curiously rational, less-dickish-than-you’d-think Bobby Jindal? You had to launch a campaign to draft XXX starlet Stormy Daniels for the U.S. senate?

I mean, sure, there’s room for humor in politics, and yes, we can certainly take a joke here in Louisiana. However, we can also take things very seriously when we want to, and let me tell you: David Vitter is no laughing matter. Not only has he caught a big ol’ case of Grade A Stupid, but he’s bound and determined to infect others. Frankly, after eight years of dumbass in the Oval Office, none of us are in the mood for it. Brains, please. Now.

Listen, you wanna do some good? Get out there and recruit someone else to get in the ring. How’s about John Breaux? He may not fuel your loins the way Ms. Daniels does, but maybe you should try thinking with your other head for a while. That alone is more than Vitter can do.

[thanks, Tyler]

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No one bothered to tell me that Blossom Dearie died. I was hoping to find a video of her doing “My Heart Belongs to Daddy” or the Rhode Island song or something a little more conventional, but this one should bring back memories for a few folks.

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Dear Oklahoma:

You know I think the world of you, even though I don’t visit as often as I should. You know I love you, even though you’re as batty as Barry Bonds on a steroid binge. But listen: we are about to have some kind of intervention/Come To Jeebus Moment regarding you and your elected officials. About ten minutes ago, I got this notice from a pal of mine; apparently, one of your own is doing some tinkering with Obama’s stimulus package:

The U.S. Senate has voted to accept, by a vote of 73-24, an amendment offered by Sen. Tom Coburn (R-OK) which states, “None of the amounts appropriated or otherwise made available by this Act may be used for any casino or other gambling establishment, aquarium, zoo, golf course, swimming pool, stadium, community park, museum, theater, art center, and highway beautification project.”

This amendment, which was supposedly intended to restrict objectionable spending in a few select federal infrastructure programs, will result in prohibiting any spending through the economic recovery in these
areas. This is the first clear vote on the arts that has occured in the U.S. Senate since July 12, 2000. The Senate final bill passage is still unclear, although it is expected to take place later tonight. Next week they will have a House-Senate conference committee to agree to a final version for the President to sign.

Seriously, Oklahoma, are you okay? Is there something you need to tell us? Is Kansas spiking your drinking water with peyote or fermented yak blood or whatever they drink up there? Does he beat you? Do we need to send help?

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Here is a photo of Carlos “The Asshat” Mencia, which I pilfered from the BestOfNewOrleans blog:

Cornify

He’s atrocious, right? A total douchebag? Perhaps a fucktard, even?

Well, you’ll be happy to know that the once and future rider in Orpheus has been officially uninvited. Doesn’t that make you feel good? Want to feel better? Press the “cornify” button just below him. Repeatedly.

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Passover in New Orleans

Bags of trash at unapproved addresses were left on sidewalks and sprayed with an X to let SDT crews know not to collect them later. [NOLA.com]

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Wow. I need a break from stupid people for a while. How about you? Maybe a little mindless eye-candy joy-joy to take your mind of the economy or the housing bubble or Phil from Accounts Receivable? Here:


Aussie diver Matthew Mitcham

I KNOW. But don’t thank me. Thank Andy.

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There’s a lot of talk of bailouts and plans of action and Important Decisions To Be Made these days. And as controversial as a lot of those plans may be, at least America’s aren’t as dumb as one being put in place by monsieur le p’tit président, France’s Nicolas Sarkosy, aimed at helping the dying medium of print:

The French state will help provide free newspaper subscriptions to teenagers for their 18th birthdays, President Nicolas Sarkozy announced Friday. But the bigger gift is for France’s ailing print media….

One of Sarkozy’s solutions to help the industry is a pilot program that will give teenagers celebrating their 18th birthday a free, yearlong subscription to any general news daily of their choice. The publisher is to give the newspapers away, while the state pays for the deliveries.

That initiative appeared designed to assuage industry fears that young readers don’t share the same appetite for print media that their parents and grandparents have, denting current and future revenues.

“The habit of reading the press is learned very young,” Sarkozy said, while insisting that the aid would only buy time for publishers to adapt to the new media landscape….

–full article at AP, via BoingBoing

Because I’m sure that all of those 18-year-olds will renew their subscriptions when they become impoverished 19-year-old college students or unemployed minimum-wagers or underemployed newspaper editors. At least, I’m sure that’s what surveys of France’s young people have shown.

I mean, Sarkozy did do surveys, didn’t he?