I am not a movie person. I know that such people exist — my husband is one — but I am not among them.

That’s not to say that I don’t watch movies. I do. Lots of them. But they are not always good. For every amazing Miyazaki film on my hard drive, there are two stinkers from Elizabeth Taylor’s “unfortunate period”. (I have watched The Driver’s Seat more times than I can count.)  I am also a sucker for completely forgettable foreign comedies. Heidi Klum would question my cinematic taste level.

But it’s worse, because I lie. I lie about having seen important films, popular films, the ones that everyone else knows. I’m secretly convinced that everyone else lies about having seen these movies, too, but I can only be certain of my own shame. Pity me.

Here is a list of 47 movies that I could’ve been watching instead of Return of the Killer Tomatoes. Although let the record show: I have no regrets.

1. Annie Hall
2. Beaches
3. American Beauty
4. Avatar
5. Back to the Future
6. Beetlejuice
7. The Big Lebowski
8. Braveheart
9. Casablanca
10. Chariots of Fire
11. Chinatown
12. Dirty Dancing
13. E.T.
14. Forrest Gump
15. The Godfather: Part II (and honestly, I don’t think I’ve ever watched the first from start to finish)
16. Goodfellas
17. I Am Curious (Yellow)
18. Iron Man (any of them)
19. Jerry McGuire
20. Lord of the Rings: Return of the King
21. Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers
22. Nashville
23. Persona
24. The Pianist
25. Pretty Woman
26. Raging Bull
27. Rain Man
28. Reservoir Dogs
29. Rocky (or the sequels, for that matter)
30. Saving Private Ryan
31. Scarface
32. Seven Samurai
33. The Shawshank Redemption
34. Silkwood
35. The Sixth Sense
36. Star Wars I: The Phantom Menace
37. Star Wars II: Attack of the Clones
38. Star Wars III: Revenge of the Sith
39. Sunset Boulevard
40. Taxi Driver
41. Terms of Endearment
42. Toy Story
43. Tootsie
44. V for Vendetta
45. Vertigo
46. X-Men (any of them)
47. Zoolander